Blog dating romance
It’s a good thing that I have a choice over how I spend my time, and that I am lucky enough to have vacation time and good friends and family to plan things with. Then, I just started to feel like it was all pointless. Some kind of fluffy wildflowers along the path were sending seed puffs waving in the wind and flying up into the sun. The words came to my mind, “All we have is Presence,” meaning, the only thing that matters is right now. I’d love to take him on a bunch of weekend trips and a road trip out west. I’ll explain plenty more about him in future posts. Over text messages, I awkwardly informed him that he was a true rebound. On the other hand, I’ve always handled this kind of planning, and I don’t want to interact with the ex any more than I have to.What’s the point of having fun if families can break up, people get old and die, and everything can go to hell? The weather was just about exactly 80 degrees, with light streaks of clouds and no humidity. Suddenly the pressure to create the perfect experiences when Tim and I are together lightened, and I realized that the elegance of every little moment matters so much more. My experience on this walk made me want to just hang out with Tim, just let go of any idea that I need to be ultra-fun. I would love to read comments – have you had any good single mama adventures with your kids? Single mom, parents need care, and I’m still trying to achieve in my career, make a contribution to this world, and parent my pre-teen single. All you need to know for the purpose of this tale is, we first met when we randomly ran into each other twice in two weeks, and then we had one great date. On one fateful Friday, I knew I wanted to see Wild Animal Man again, so I texted to ask him for just that. I hastily decided to just call his dad and fill him in.Yes, vacations were happy experiences, but I tried to use to make up for weeks and months of isolation and lack of support in my relationship. We have a little nature trail you can take that leads to a coffee shop. Hey, somebody’s gotta get egg on their face and show they like the other person at some point, right? It’s never been easier to find and communicate with the objects of our admiration–and to make dumb mistakes at a rapid pace, too! With Love, Molly Undercover In her famous Ted talk on vulnerability, Brené Brown says, “vulnerability is. I felt repulsed by the idea of being in a relationship again and hopeless that I’d never be able to connect with a man again. We were the only people there, which amped up the awkward feeling. Nervous and feeling vulnerable, I did the old ‘cheek turn’ trick and let him plant one there. I just had such a hot mess of a phone call with his Dad about it. I’m trying to be cool and functional and reasonable, but inside I’m still dealing with some strong feelings , and I know it shows in my voice and my decisions.It’s a good thing that I’m no longer sitting passively by and letting some man make decisions for me all the time, and feeling unhappy. I walked with stress about whether I could give Tim enough fun this summer running through my mind. There’s so many places I want to go, both as a free single lady and with Tim. Do you have a super embarrassing digital-age blooper under your dating belt? But I was also worried that if I passed up dates, I’d calcify and never get back in the game. When someone cute but not ‘my type’ asked me out, my fear of becoming a lonely cat lady if I didn’t start dating pushed me to just try it and see what happened. Putting me at ease, he stated that he’d probably be a awkward when we met because he thought I was gorgeous! I arranged for my son to go home with a friend so that I could meet him for a patio happy hour one afternoon. I was still nervous that he might expect something. But contrary to his warning, my date was actually laid back and fun, totally confident, and looked and smelled great. As we played giant Jenga on the patio, his confidence and masculine presence infused me with my own confidence. Brushing my wrists and finding other ways to make contact as we goofed around and talked. Here’s what happened: I emailed an invite to a bunch of parents about a fun party night for Tim for his 12th birthday. Right after I pressed send, I panicked; should I have consulted with my ex before unilaterally planning? Would Tim be hurt if his dad wasn’t there for his party like he always has been in the past? He’ll ignore my texts until he wants to talk to me. I went to a breakfast cafe with Tim for a fun mom-and-kid breakfast. This is the kind of stuff I used to get heavy input from Tim’s dad on. In between dates, we have been practically strangers to each other. If we can’t talk intelligently about what’s going on in the world, forget it. I also have weeks of vacation saved up at work, and only need to make a plan in order to be on the road somewhere. But for some reason, I am having a terrible time committing to any particular plan for weekend trips or longer vacations. On the surface, it’s just indecision, but if I sit with my feelings a little bit I realize I’m feeling alone. Back at his apartment, there was just enough red wine and good lighting. He played guitar; he sang songs I didn’t know, too, with gusto.
He asked if he could take Tim for a birthday dinner on his actual birthday.
As it turned out, the landing was one of the most graceful things I’ve experienced.
Dancing together, goofing off with his friends and loving the music. He decided he wanted to try landing on grass, and warned that it could feel bumpy but would be fine.
When he gets up to go to the bathroom I decide to risk asking him about his politics when he returns. All I can think about is how people in earshot must be so annoyed to have to listen to our attempt to connect. This was before I’d called the Centaur but after I’d met him and got his number. They are so cute together, cracking each other up all day, developing inside jokes and having fun.
As I was leaving the nightmare awkward date, above, I looked to my right and realized The Centaur had been sitting there the whole time, hearing every word. Today, it’s the process of planning vacations that sets me off (I know, I’m pretty lucky if this is the type of thing that gets me upset). Tim has his two middle-school aged cousins in town this week, and life is good.
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It’s a tough world out there, and if there’s something that brings you comfort and hurts no one, by all means, you do You! He popped up beside me and we had fun like we’d never had before. (I’d show the pics to you, but then I’d have to kill you :-))We took off and he showed off his skills for a while. As I observed him in his element, I felt enchanted.