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We can aim to please ourselves or each other, and put our all into that.

We get to choose what we do with which body parts, and how we use them, how we communicate and how we listen and what we do with that information.

Your little sister walked in on you, or you shot a condom across the room while trying to get it on and your unstoppable laughter kept you from getting back into your sexy.

You and someone else just may not be clicking: everything you do starts out being something one of you likes, and turns out to be something the other doesn't.

Being able to experience and move forward from anything from a mere disappointment to a terrible trauma or tragedy is vital for being able to live our lives and find happiness in them.Being unpleasantly surprised by our emotional reactions to certain things -- like having post-breakup sex you thought you were cool with, only to find out that you are in no way cool with it -- can also be something we may need to cry out rather than laugh off.Some bummers are more challenging or emotionally rough than others.If those pieces Many sex bummers are silly or funny, so long as we have a sense of humor about them.Others aren't, like being triggered during sex from previous trauma or abuse, or having someone you just had otherwise-amazing sex with open their mouth after and say something carelessly stupid that gets them the gold in the Douchebag Olympics.

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